Ever have one of those days, when you wake up and get a feeling that something is not right with the world.  Well, at least your little corner of it?  Today was definitely one of those days.  I pulled open the blinds in my bedroom to find the most beautifully serene scene of freshly fallen snow with moon light gleaming off the trees.  It was a post card kind of picture.  I thought to myself, “what ever is wrong, it can’t be that bad, right??!!”  So I get ready, shower, coffee, make-up, coat, gloves, scraper and off I go.  20 minutes later, I am safely at work, with only 3 stop signs that I slid through.  Walk into the desk area and all hell is breaking loose.  I work at a military post with many young soldiers who can hardly drive in Florida on a sunny Sunday afternoon with the temps at 70.  So needless to say, with the temp at 20 and the 4 inches of snow on the ground, made for a very busy day.  Night shift left around 6ish and also left about 7 folders of unfinished paperwork.  If you have ever been driving in Germany then you will probably know what I am talking about here.  The roads in the town are fairly small and most of them are cobble-stoned.  For some reason, this triggers the fight or flight center in the German mind.  So you take a beat up, multi-colored, 1988 BMW with the muffler falling off and a 30ish year old male German behind the wheel.  All of a sudden, he’s driving in Le Mans and is way behind and in need to going 100kms (60mph) or faster in town.  This is the guy that the Army decided to pay to plow the parking lot and streets on post.  9 vehicles later and 3 bumpers removed, we now know why I should have stayed home.

After 2 hours later and all that headache stuff is taken care of, I get a call from the legal office.  The guy there is asking me why I didn’t do this last night and how come he wasn’t notified and it was all wrong and just going off about how I just fucked this paperwork all up.  So I calmly tell this man, who is quite a few levels higher than myself to stop, open the paper work up and re-read with his eyes open and see who’s name is signed on the bottom line.  Well damn if it isn’t my name.  That’s funny, last night I was sleeping at home nowhere near the post, that’s why I am here now, during day shift. So the guy stops and says, “well, its your signature right here, I looking right at it.  I’ll be there in 5 minutes.”  3 minutes later, I’m looking at a very bad attempt to copy my signature.  “Well Fuck Me Running!”  That ass clown that I have has issues with in the past that was just the nicest to my face guy that I just relived, is trying to really screw.  What the fuck man?!  At this point I am getting a bit angered and I decide that I’ll go back to work and hope that nothing like this happens again, and to just calm my nerves. 

I go back to working and finish all the slack that Ass-Clown left me and I get a moment to open my e-mail.  3 e-mails from my boss, my boss’s boss, and his boss, the BIG boss, asking me to give them a call when I get a chance.  What now?  I reluctantly pick up and dial.  Come to find out, the local Poleizi (the German cops) now want to know about this huge case that I fucked up on.  Holy Shit, you have got to be kidding me.  One quick fax of the schedule and 3 phone calls and 3, “well, we know it was a mistake, but you have to keep on top of things” pathetic apologies later.  What ever, the next time I see Ass-Clown at work, he better be eating his own shit. 

At the end of the day, I come home relax with a nice glass of wine and watch “Pimp My Ride” with X-ibit speaking German.  Gotta love it.

Ciao for now!